3 UPDATES: Husband Has An Affair & Rich In-laws Laugh On My Face Telling Me That They’re Going To Destroy Me In Court…. Karma Had Diff Plans Though Bcus I Got The Last Laugh Watching Them Get Put In Jail Bcus They Did THIS
Do you want me to share your story? Kindly email it to me at [email protected] and if I like your story I’ll feature it on my channel! 🙂
I found out about my husband’s affair purely by luck and thank the heavens because I don’t know how long he was going to fool me. He bought me a new ring on my birthday that was too loose for my size. I asked him for the receipt so I could go in and get it exchanged but fortunately, he had left the bag with the receipt in it at his office.
#aitareddit #redditaita #reddit #aita #relationships
source
It’s not your fault but grandma should have had an iron clad will, this sneaky money is tacky.
The husband seems like a real idiot. I fear how he will gaslight his daughter. Because he was aware what he was doing was wrong. Because why else keep it from her and try to stop her from going to the office. I also hope his boss finds out because most places don't allow that sort of thing.
How dumb is that family. Makes me wonder if the husband's parents had a open marriage and they had their different partners or if the mother in law is just a idiot. Because what they did ruined whatever reputation they had more then a divorce.
Also hope selling out his friend to cover his debt was worth it. Because I can bet he just lost all of his friends. If they are still in contact they have most certainly lost everyone's trust and respect. Like what was going through this guy's mind.
The OP was right to tell her family off. They only care about the money. But I do question who exactly told them. Maybe OPs dad or someone else. Unless OP or their mom bought something expensive and someone found out and got mad. It almost sounds like they have been stalking them this whole time.
For the final story the OP's mom dose seem like a witch. She probably takes the phone because she doesn't approve of it. That thinks their kid is up to something having such a nice phone. After all they got mad they bought that phone instead of books for school. That is why they are being petty and taking it for the smallest of things. OP also should check to see is mom put anything on the phone as well. To track them or see what they are doing on it.
Every parent I know with a teen uses the time out from electronics as corrective means. It's very effective. It's definitely one way to teach them there are consequences for their actions, especially for when they reach the real world. I don't have any teens now but have raised them. There were no electronics then like there is today. So I think if you haven't raised a teen yet and gone through those turbulent years with them you should wait on judgement. A parent who doesn't teach their children there are consequences is just raising an entitled adult with no remorse or empathy for others or responsibility for their actions.
I have to say tell the truth always. Yes you can make it a little bit more palatable but in the end the truth WILL come out and it can be devastating when it does. I was 4 when my parents split up and I was told nothing. I knew there were fights, my dad vanishing, waving him goodbye and asking my mum where he was going. She said nothing. My brother and sister blamed me for him leaving and a whole heap of other things. I had abandonment issues big time. Then the weekly Sunday visits where we would be switched over at a pub car park. (It was the seventies so normal even though divorce wasn’t very normal at that time) It was horrible and as a young child your imagination is all over the place creating all kinds of reasons and listening to those around you that it must have been my fault then trying to figure out what I did wrong, going over and over it all trying to make sense of it all. So being told the truth would have been better then at least there would be something firm to build on as it was I grew up with so many insecurities. No understanding how relationships worked. It has been hell. When I had children of my own, I told them everything that they needed to know obviously I kept some things back which I knew wouldn’t help them but I at least feel I made the right choice. My children are fiercely independent young adults. One is married and the other is in a long term relationship with his partner and has 2 children now. I still struggle with relationships and my ones with my mum, brother and sister are now non existent. This could have been so different if the truth had been explained properly. So let my story be a cautionary tale and help those going through the same thing as the op to think long and hard to what you tell your children. Kids may be young and you might think they are too young to understand but don’t under estimate them and tell them so it becomes the norm to know what is happening. Kids know when something is up no matter what age they are.
I've been watching too many asian comedians talking about their parents lately to be able to form an objective comment on the phone story. All I can think of is: EMOTIONAL DAMAGE!
Granma knew wat she was doing!! Call them back and tell them the police are being called and get a protective order!
Story 1: OP was NTA right up to the moment she weaponized the kid. She gets 5 days a week and he gets 2 days per week, but "I'll have to be happy with this arrangement for now." Was what the husband did to her horrible? Yes, but using their child to hurt him back is just evil.
Okay, OP's AITA question had little or nothing to do with the circumstances of her divorce, so NONE of that part of the story matters.
She asks "Is she the A-Hole for NOT explaining to her daughter what is going on?"
The answer to that is;
Her daughter KNOWS something traumatic is going on and is already feeling the stress, but OP has no idea if and how to explain things to her.
Right now OP needs the help of a professional family therapist.
Someone who can hear the whole story from OP, and help her formulate a means of giving her daughter an AGE APPROPRIATE summation of the situation, and help the child learn how to cope.
A-Hole doesn't enter into this, it's a sticky situation, and OP needs to ask for help.
No shame in that at all.
Op 3 just bide your time and when your free of her and her rules living your own life tell her she’s a petty and vindictive bitch and you don’t want that toxic poison in your life, it’ll be great revenge when you have kids.
lady your a bit of bs here. you state your husband wanted the majority of the time with him. but you stated you wouldn't let him win that easily. not i love my little girl more then life, but him winning? well at least you weren't greedy as well as being a bit*h.
Hon, you buying a phone is a sign that your are growing up and becoming an adult and becoming self-reliant. Your Mom sees it as a threat to her losing control over you. Growing up isn't just rough on children it's just as hard on the Mothers.
When I was growing p in the 50s-60s, parents routinely lied to their children all the time, because the thinking was the children didn't need to know about "adult" matters. I can tell you that a child's imagination goes wild over the most mundane things if not explained truthfully.
Really it is the parents who are uncomfortable with whatever the topic is, like sex.
What the kids will imagine about divorce is so much worse than the real reasons, and being kids will think it is all about them and that they caused the split, no matter how obvious it is that it isn't anything at all to do with the child. Then some children will act out, or actually do the opposite, try to be the perfect child, thinking that if they did something bad to cause the divorce that if they are perfect enough the parents will get back together. Then internalize it to thinking they aren't good enough or perfect enough when the parents stay divorced and the children STILL blame themselves.
And THAT is why it is helpful to have a professional's advice on how to do this.
The Mum in the 3rd story is horrible, that was OP's phone payed with OP's money and she's literally using it to abuse him. OP should phone the police next time she does this and tell the Dad to get her to stop, I hope OP cuts contact with her the second he's able to move out
How was #1 OP unable to use the lies her in-laws told to help her in custody? The daughter is high risk for alienation. Especially seeing as how dad can have fun weekends, and OP can't.
When my dad was dying of cancer, I quit my job and went home to take care of him until the end. He lived with us and I don't regret what I did for one moment.
"affairs are common and marriages don't break over it". Witch what world do you live in? One, affairs shouldn't be common in the first place. Ever heard of staying true to the one you love? And 2 yes, marriages do break over affairs. All that witch cared about her son not getting any bad publicity, she didn't care about Op. Yeah, threatening to destroy op in court is a classic case of thinking money can buy everything and their above the law. Funny how karma says otherwise.
Doesn’t your mother realize that your phone means she can always get in touch with you if she needs to and can keep you safe? Maybe remind her of the positives. It’s also convenient if she wants needs you to grab something at the store. And isn’t it her place to buy your school books? When I started working I was still in school and me dad still thought he should buy my clothes.
Tell your father how she is acting .
Maybe he needs to take her phone from her.
Maybe she should get .
Is mommy the wicked step mom.
Let find out
What a horrible way to find out your husband is cheating seriously man when you find the woman you love don’t sleep around and don’t marry untill you find the right woman
So his mother thinks it’s OK for him to do this lots of people divorce over cheating. I can’t believe what his mother said.
Playing dirty get them OP
OP closest friend, did this disgusting.
You need to explain the truth as best as you can, without completely bashing, your husband and his family
Seriously people after they get married should not be able to have kids for two years. These kids get in the middle and that is why we have so many messed up mental health issues in this world because people are selfish.
S1 I hope you took pictures for court. Get your papers and bank accounts in order get that ring in a safety deposit box along with any money. Your mil got slapped. You need to tell your daughter the truth. You tell her daddy y die something bad and he can't live with you anymore. Never trust a LIAR. That includes your in-laws and your friend.
S2 NTA your grandma left you that inheritance for a reason. It doesn't matter how they found out. They got what they deserved. Block them all, none of this your fault. You have nothing to feel guilty about. They suck
S3 NTA your mom is unhinged. Why is your dad allowing her to pull this crap.
They laughed IN her face, not on it.
Case one I would make a stipulation that grandparents are not allowed anywhere near my child when they do get out because they are clearly terrible people. And nobody needs that rubbing off on their kid. Husband should have gotten in some trouble that's not fair he is the one who cheated and with his secretary of all people come on, How unoriginal of him. And he is her boss so that's wrong. Unfortunately protecting the innocence of the child is not what all mothers try to do, The good ones yes. Case 2 the truth hurts and that's what you gave them your mom is a great mother and you were right to tell him exactly how it was. Your mother really should block them she's only hurting herself by listening to this BS and never ever give those toxic human beings any money. It's not what your grandmother wanted and you And your mom clearly loved her. The phone wasn't even in the kitchen while he was cooking so I doubt that's the case. Maybe his mother is going through his phone often and that's why she keeps taking it it's not right he works for it he paid for it his dad is on board. Mothers being unreasonable and dad should be standing up for his kid. If she is jealous of her kid's phone and just using it to be ignorant to her own child something's wrong with her.
It's not so hard to tell young kids about the divorce, they understand more than many think and most would be happy with the information that they have two homes where she visits, she doesn't care why it did happen, she cares about having happy parents (or at least parent)
No, no, no. Op needs to find a way to tell the child the father did wrong. I've seen in so many of these stories where the one who had the affair will say the innocent party was the reason for everything going bad, even so far as to try and alienate the child.
The story about the grandma, OP is NTA. I have relatives that are the same way. One relative said that she and her hubby wouldn't be able to make the funeral if it was during the week, but that they could if it was the on the weekend, because hubby's workplace wouldn't give him the time off, which was total bs, because any company would give their employees time off in the event of an emergency. My uncle who handled the arrangements then changed the funeral til the weekend and that same relative that was saying that they couldn't make it- had the audacity to ask my uncle why the time was changed. I had called my uncle and we were complaining about said relative, and even stated that how is it that the son can't make it during the week, but the grandson- who is in the military and literally has no say in anything- can make it with no problems.
Yes! As a minor, she/ they are completely responsible for books, tuition, room and board!
Why on earth would your mother expect you to buy school books? Is the financial situation at home so dire, that you are having to accept financial responsibility for things your parents should (the word means they have no choice) absolutely be paying for? Is she bad with money or just petty? You will need your dad's help to find answers. All the best.