Noel plays Elden Ring: Nice to beat you, Mace to Face [hololive/engsub]



Noel Shirogane plays Elden Ring.

Original stream: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p6LTk9Z209M

@Noel Ch. 白銀ノエル

This spot on the world is a crucible black, cold with eons-old ash, and a merciless wind that lets nothing settle or grow or live. It is a place past the end, where light to goes die, where even fire fears to wag its many forked tongues.

It is a Walmart parking lot, 3 AM.

There, atop the dunes of discarded flyers, a cloaked figure looms, dark against the blood-tinged moon. A mane of silver, warbling in the wind like mercury, feeling out the night like a grasping anemone. It is consuming something.

A Happy Meal.

With a toy.

A duck-like girl, fresh from the Medieval Emporium and Apothecary, steps from a city bus, a baseball cap set on the helmet she wears. Braced on her shoulder is a novelty great mace. She is at ease. She thinks she is alone. She thinks there is nothing to fear.

She does not see the creature raise its ketchup-stained maw from its quarter-pounder.

With cheese.

The girl is quacking to herself. She admires the great mace and swings it around playfully until she hits herself in the kneecap and then stops and becomes very silent. She wishes she would have bought the plague doctor mask instead.

Nursing her wound, she does not hear the creeping shadow approach. Only when it speaks does she realize she is not alone.

“Hand it over. That thing, your great mace.”

The girl spins around. A silver-haired knight, eerily gazing, fixated on her novelty great mace. Her breath catches, but soon she does what does best.

Quack assertively.

“What? No way! I bought this with my own money! Get your own great mace.” The girl’s visor shuts with a snap, and she hurriedly lifts it again and peers out of the slot suspiciously. “They sell them for five dollars at the Medieval Emporium and Apothecary.”

The knight pouts. “I spent my money on a happy meal and all I got was this stupid toy.” She holds up a strange mask with what appears to be a duck bill fixed to the face. “Garbage,” says the knight, lowering her hand dejectedly.

The girl’s eyes light up. “Is that a plague doctor mask?” She licks her lips. “With a duck bill?”

“No, it’s garbage. I just told you that.”

“Oh, right. Garbage.” The girl laughs and rubs the back of her head but her eyes gleam with greed. Her face glistens with sweat, her mouth is dry. She shuts her eyes tight then opens them wide. Her kneecap really hurts. “But,” she begins hesitantly, “What are you gonna do with it?”

The knight stares at her like she were a pizza without pineapple. “Throw it away, obviously.”

“Don’t!” honks the girl. “I’ll trade you! I’ll give you the mace. You give me the mask.”

“I want the helmet, too,” says the knight.

“But you’ve already got one.”

“I want two.”

“What for?”

The knight shrugs. “In case I grow another head.”

The girl hops from one foot to the other and groans. Then she sighs and says, “Fine.”

They exchange accoutrements, and part ways, satisfied strangers each.

A minute later the knight returns and takes the plague mask, too.

Just in case she grows a third head.

source

30 thoughts on “Noel plays Elden Ring: Nice to beat you, Mace to Face [hololive/engsub]”

  1. As always your stories in the description are hilarious and amazing. I hope its OK to ask this but are there any reasons you are trying to sub noel recently ? You were dedicated to nene clips in the past so that's why I am asking. Again I hope my question doesn't sound wrong. I love what you do and the amazing stuff you write. Just curious.

    Reply
  2. Brilliant title, Great description story.
    I never played any of the FromSoft games and haven't been following any streams but seeing Noel playing this and having fun is nice.

    Reply
  3. Thank you for the amazing video Maple~
    I haven't caught your videos in a while but glad to see your still a god among men
    Awesome translation and brilliant description, Keep up the hard work ^-^
    I hope you are well, Have a great rest of your week, Be safe and Take care out there wherever you are (^=W=^)

    Reply

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