We had a pretty good time opening these Christmas Crackers in the lead up to the festive season and seeing what random jokes they held inside them. A few were disappointing but there were also a couple that were surprisingly good!
Hope you enjoy! Leave your go to Dad Joke in the comments.
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source
How many letters has the alphabet at Xmas time?
A. 25 cos the angels sang NOEL
The Waffle House has found it's newest host
What does Santa suffer from when he gets stuck in a chimney?
– Claustrophobia
Why do Christmas trees like the past?
– Because the present's beneath them
What did the boy with no arms get in his presents?
– I don't know, he hasn't opened them yet
What kind of weed do you smoke before you do your shows?
3:23 Heard this one but it was "a coat hanger"
Maybe a funny thing to do is don't laugh with water in the mouth and the jokes
I'm English and I have had turkey on Christmas day for 34 years straight
There are shepherds in the Christmas story – that’s why the lamb joke is a Christmas joke.
You know that pat Cummins got married right one night I heard his wife is yelling at him so sad poor man. Pat she was like cum baby cum 😂😂
we eat turkey on Thanksgiving and christmas in the usa.
Some in the USA have turkey at Christmas. Others have ham. But it's almost always turkey for our Thanksgiving.
How do you turn a duck into a soul singer?
Stick it in the microwave until its Bill Withers
I'm told the ghosts are full of sheet.
I am not a huge turkey fan but they are popular for Thankgiving AND Christmas here in the U.S.
Two nuns were cycling to church. They were diverted down a cobbled street. When they got to church one of the nuns turned to the other and said, "I've never came that way before."
I would have thought that the 3-legged donkey would have been a "lame-ass"