Aliens Learn Why Defeating Humanity Is Actually Impossible | Best HFY Stories



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26 thoughts on “Aliens Learn Why Defeating Humanity Is Actually Impossible | Best HFY Stories”

  1. 29:30 Oh, "spark of rebellion," interesting…. I see a civil war with the rebellions allying with the humans against the war lords in the future. I finished watching before commenting so I know I'm wrong but it would be an interesting twist since the people are unhappy with how the war lords treat them.

    Reply
  2. A story about various different Deathworld people of various species randomly meeting in a random bar (such an unfortunate bar, such unfortunate other customers, poor bartender, extremely high compensation for all damage) would be fun to listen to.

    Reply
  3. A: "do you know that in the Human-Onnarick war the Humans were known to play a song before wiping out Onnarick planets?"
    B: "I heard about a song, but that's about it. What was it?"
    A: "It's a song from the Human homeworld. Old song, made with a completely different intention back then but it got turned into the herald of destruction for the Onnarick. Humans brute forced all their systems to play the song at full volume from every capable equipment within reach. It said something along the lines of "here comes the sun, du-du-du-du, here comes the sun, it's alright…"
    B: "Here comes the sun? Is that the song that humans sing when dropping nukes on their enemies?"
    A: "Yeah, most of the time. With the Onnarick though, that wasn't about nukes"
    B: "Wait, what do you mean it wasn't about nukes? D-did they-"
    A: "Make their stars go supernova to wipe out the Onnarick? Yeah, pretty much"
    B: "Humans are fucking crazy!"

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  4. Now this story was a good one. It makes up for that dog of a story about the horrible first contact between humans explorers and the angry distrustful bug ppl who are scared of things with bones. I loved how this one ended. I hope there will be more chapters. I want to find out what happens with an intergalactic war that starts with two atomic bombs. I can see it escalating to humans probably dropping something close to that used under an Imperium Exterminatus decree in WH40k

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  5. The ending was kinda gay not gonna lie. Japan had already tried to surrender, and was engaged in acts of war with Japan prior to Pearl Harbor. This scenario tries to compare the two, but from the sounds of it there was no conflict prior to this attack. Now maybe it could stand as a warning to the malicious petty mass murder humans are willing to commit on a defeated enemy after the war was basically over.

    Reply
  6. "So. You lost containment?"
    The poor Sargent Major didn't even blink.
    "We got it back." A simple statement. He was kind of smiling.
    "What did you do?" There was a brief OH FUCK moment. The Sargent just looked back, calm and serene as is if this was just another Wednesday.

    "Well sir, we couldn't find anything but a mouth and a cloaca. We just found their comm freqs and sent them a few dozen specific PornHub vids."

    Admiral Greer facepalmed. Before he could say anything else, the Sargent said simply, "They won't be back."

    "How do you know?"

    "Mothballs sir."

    "Mothballs?"

    "In the cloaca."

    Admiral Greer facepalmed again. "How many?"

    "Uhhhh, three quarters of a can sir?"

    "And how many is that?"

    There were snapping fingers pointing off screen and a demand for numbers entirely unspoken.

    "70 to 85, sir."

    "So, you're telling me there's an alien with 75 mothballs in his ass, leaving orbit at lightspeed?'

    "Well, they started the anal probes decades ago…. seemed fair, sir."

    Reply
  7. Physics Question: Assuming the moon in question has no atmosphere(and I realize that is an unwarranted assumption), Wouldn't the explosion be more spherical, since there would be no air pressure to force the debris cloud towards the center? 🤔

    Reply

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